For all you tired parents out there, before you leave the house in the morning, I’ve got a couple of tips:
- Are your pants on inside out?
- Are you wearing shoes? Are you sure?
- Are you leaving your house with your kid? Yes remember to bring him/her with you when you leave to drop him/her off at school.
- Should you really be operating a car today?
- Where is the closest Starbucks?
Let me explain how I came up with these five tips.
Forget being tired. I am talking about full-blown exhaustion here.
I know this a terrible analogy, but there is a reason why torture victims are deprived of sleep. Nine times of out ten I would vote for no food over even just a 20-minute cat nap.
Just to be perfectly clear here, I am not trying to complain. I know everyone has their crosses to bear. I am simply sharing my story about what kind of heinous things exhaustion can do to you so you can beware.
Ok, so I am not sleeping.
Yes, I have an infant who is 3 months old and an almost 4 year old who is battling sleep regression and wakes up 3 times a night.
Enter the fact that I have a hard time going to sleep early and well, yeah, trying to run a business. In fact, if I were wise, I would be taking a nap right now instead of writing.
So here goes my story.
A couple short weeks ago, I was dashing out the door to drop my little guy at school for kindergarten. I was also trying to attend a meeting at 10am, right after drop off.
I raced out of the shower, threw on a dress, tried my best to do my hair and makeup, dashed down the stairs, collected my kid, grabbed his knapsack, opened the garage door…one foot out the door…when I hear, “Michelle! Look down…”
Yes. Nanny to the rescue. I looked down. I was about the leave the house wearing a dress and… my slippers.
Embarrassment and catastrophe averted. Phew.
I managed to get my kid to school. My eyes were still at half mast because I didn’t get the chance to eat – or consume copious amounts of coffee.
Anyway, why wasn’t my car door opening? So weird.
I tried pressing the automatic key lock several times, but nothing.
Maybe it was time for me to try opening the door manually? The door still wasn’t unlocking. Well – maybe that’s because I was trying to get into a silver minivan. Um…I drive a silver Honda Pilot SUV. A big ass truck.
OK….keep going Michelle. I take the highway to my meeting. Really I should not have been driving. I know.
I try parking in the underground garage which results in several attempts to squeeze my big ass truck in a tight space. This is even after stopping for coffee along the way.
Nothing is helping.
I finally get to my meeting. The coffee has kicked in by now, and surprisingly, I am making sense as a I speak. The meeting wraps up and I head down to the parking garage. I find the right vehicle this time and get in.
I approach the underground garage door and it is not opening. I try pressing a button in the garage and – nothing.
After being stuck underground for about 20 minutes, I decide to buzz the concierge. It takes a couple calls before I reach him.
“Ma’am, the garage door should be opening. Where abouts are you?”
“I am by the garage door and it is not opening.”
“OK I will come down and help you.”
Just then I realize, I am clearly not at the same door that I entered. I turn my big ass truck around again almost taking out several concrete pillars. I find myself in front of another garage door and a totally confused concierge.
So now the garage opens….
Yes, I should have returned to bed and cancelled my meeting because sometimes being so tired is the same as being inebriated.